mom: hey *dad’s name* oh whoops i mean *brother’s name* oh no *sister’s name* i mean *name of the family goldfish* ah shoot i meant *your name* can you get down here really quick i need something
Have you ever played a video game where you have to sleep to recover? They only let you do it if everything is safe. Otherwise they won’t let you sleep. You’ll get a message, saying “You cannot sleep now, there are monsters nearby.”
Now, remember the last time you just couldn’t get to sleep?
Don’t you fuckin do this to me
She looks dumb as hellit’s more embarrassing that they’re still together
why do they look so happy to be there? they standing out in the mall with big ass grins on their faces like “haha aren’t we a cute couple? this is the third time my boyfriend fucked another girl so i had to get creative with the punishments.” she’s dating a dude who not only cheated on her but has the worst taste in shoes of any human being to ever live